16 February 2006

Elevator Idiots

I work in a 4-story building, and use the elevators every day. Yeah, you can call me lazy if you like, and I'll be the first to admit I should use the stairs more often. Usually if I'm not carrying anything in my hands, I will take the stairs. Maybe if I did it more often, I'd be less irritated by the numbskulls and/or even lazier people that I encounter on the elevators.

The ones that bug me the most are the ones who think that just because they pushed the call button, the elevator that arrives must be just for them. So, they just barge into the elevator, not waiting for the current occupants to exit. One time, I put a shoulder into a guy who barged in like that, and I didn't apologize for it. That'll learn 'im.

Then there are the one-hit wonders. The folks who only go up or down one floor. I can understand if you have a health condition (I did the one-floor thing once or twice when I was on crutches), or you're carrying something bulky or unwieldy (or heavy). But the apparently healthy one-hit wonders - carrying nothing - annoy the crap out of me. Especially the ones who get on at 3 and off at 2 when I'm going from 4 to 1. 'Home run elevator' is what I call it - you 'touch em all'.

All of this was even more annoying when I was on crutches. It was made even worse by the poor attempts at humor made by complete strangers (the company is huge). But I blogged about that already.

Yeah. More stairs, less elevator for me. That'd be better.

5 comments:

punkindunkin said...

Yeah! Those one flight elevator people drive me nuts too! I work in a small two story office building (with an underground parking garage) and there is a hugely disproportionate number of people who go from the first floor to the second floor and back again strictly by the elevator. It's as if they are allergic to the stairs. I could understand if we had 3 or more stories, but we don't and the 16 or so steps are not going to kill anyone. I do work with many people who have health issues, although I suspect many are the product of incredibly poor lifestyle habits. If you can’t walk up a flight of stairs and you should be otherwise able-bodied, you’ve got a big problem!

Major Clanger said...

I'm totally with you there, Mr. Ronin. I try to use those stairs as much as possible, but sometimes peer pressure and forgetfulness get the better of me. It's the ones who go down one floor that annoy me most - down isn't so hard for the able bodied.

As for the "conversation" - don't get me started. An elevator stranger today asked me to say as much as possible just so she could hear my funny accent. I didn't oblige her, she should get BBC America if she wants funny accents, I'm nobody's performing monkey!

Ghost Dog said...

How'd she know you were British?

SOLOFLYER said...

Know what'll learn em, clothes line as they are barging in, and it will get their goat even worse if you dont say sorry (Just make like you are checking your watch)Inconsiderate no courtesy havin bastards

Major Clanger said...

Dr. Dog wrote: "How'd she know you were British?". You'd be surprised at how few words I need to say for people to realize I speak funny... a few words of elevator bantor (such as "which floor?") is usually enough. Single words give it away "water" and "bollocks" are two which are dead givaways...